This will never happen, but a person can dream, can’t they?:
When I become the richest man in the world, I will hire thugs to kidnap Zuckerberg, Gates, the CEOs of the biggest Internet monopolies in the U.S., a bunch of web programmers, internet advertising developers, and anyone else my hired flunkies think are part of the problem. We will lock each one, alone, in a separate room for a weekend with all the food, drink, running water, and toiletries they need, a cushy bed to sleep in. They would have no computer, TV, phones of any kind, not even books, nothing to write with either, no windows. Their loved ones would be informed that they are safe. Their only stimulus would be newspapers. The newspapers would be held by robots. The rooms would be monitored by keepers who would control the robots to keep the robots or the newspapers from being touched by the “inmates.” The robot newspaper-holder would fold the paper so that about 4 vertical inches would show at a time. The robot would “read” the eyes of the reader, so that it could tell when the reader was done with a certain section, and have a lag of 30 seconds to 2 minutes before it would show more newspaper. If the reader wanted to read more, they could tell the robot, which would be programmed to then open up more of the newspaper for the reader, but the paper would jump up and down several inches, for about 2 minutes, while the reader tried to concentrate on it. The reader would periodically have to read several slowly unfolding video ads on a monitor which would periodically power up on the robot, and the reader would have to answer questions about the ads before reading any more of the newspaper.
After about a half-day of this, the “inmates” would be allowed access to a keyboard, hooked only to a stand-alone computer programmed to only do word-processing. Any attempt to use the keyboard to change the computer’s function would result in complete shutdown of the computer and taking away of the newspapers. They would be allowed to type any text they want, but every goddamn character they typed would have a maddening delay of 1 to 3 seconds before it would appear on the monitor in front of them. They would be informed that they could speed up this typing process, if they turn off the computer every half hour and restart it. Or they could speed it up by watching several more ads and answering quiz questions about the ads.
After about 12 hours of this treatment, the inmates would be allowed to leave one day early, as long as they issued a video statement to be made public upon their release, acknowledging their part in making the world of the internet, at least as known in the U.S., a big, giant, confusing, annoying, stuttering, ridiculously expensive, stupid pain-in-the-ass, when it could instead be a constantly enjoyable, informative, entertaining, illuminating experience. You know, like it should be.
Thank you for letting me vent.