Musings Inspired By My Daughter’s Current Netflix Obsession

I know this poem isn’t really in the festive holiday spirit, but I wrote it last night because of a question my little one asked while she took a break from watching YouTube Minecraft videos or drawing cats, to create some computer art with Digimon themes, while waiting for this Christmas Eve morning to get here so we could open presents:

“Dad, how do you spell woman like in ‘Angewoman?'”
“W-o-m-a-n,” said I,
(I did not say “as in the woe of man”)
Which has more of a ring to it
Than “the bane of man”
“Baneman”
(“Do you take this baneman to be your awfully wedded strife?”)
Or “pain-in-the-(shall we say)side-man”
(Shouldn’t every man’s ribs ache a little for Adam?)
“Gift-to-man” has a sound that is fleeting somehow
“Moving-furniture-around-every-3-months-for-no-reason-
with-the-grudging-help-of-man”
Is way too long a word
So “woe-man” it is,
Woman
The eternal mystery
Life-giving
Heart-taking
Woman

————
(The second time in a couple weeks that I’ve accidentally hit Publish instead of Preview; oh, well it was a short post so didn’t require a whole lot of editing, and it’s not nearly as sure of a sign that I’m ready for the Alzheimer’s wing of the local old-folks home as it is when I put empty Tupperware in the fridge instead of the cupboard.)
PS: Of course I was wrong in the first place, because all the digital monster names of Digimon end in “mon,” so it’s “Angewomon,” but who’s keeping score, right? Happy holidays.

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5 Responses to Musings Inspired By My Daughter’s Current Netflix Obsession

  1. ksbeth says:

    hey mon, happychristmas. no worries.

  2. BroadBlogs says:

    Gee, so sorry you’ve come to see women that way. I hope your daughter doesn’t come to see herself that way. Makes me wonder how having a daughter affects your way of seeing women. Looks like it hasn’t been too beneficial so far. I’m sorry about that.

    • Hi, BB. I’m not always to be taken literally. My daughter, Hope, does give me a lot of hope for the world, and she is surrounded by love and nurturing, so she will be fine, I believe. I know many women who are wonderful people on their own, as well as great girlfriends and spouses to their mates, and I would be happy to be around them more. The choices that I have made in women, or that I have stumbled into, have been extremely poor ones and have left a bad taste in my mouth. Though I believe that a lot of people find good mates, and I hope that my daughter is among them, I would be less surprised by Yellowstone blowing its top than I would be by ME finding a mate before I die.

      In the end, though, this poem is mostly tongue-in-cheek, though I always stand by the idea that furniture doesn’t need to be moved around every few months. I don’t care how nice the woman is; she can get someone else to help with that, ha ha.

    • Sometimes, unlike a person who gets angry right away, I have the opposite reaction–I am apologetic at first, then become irritated when I think about something for a while.
      I don’t typically reply in a harsh way to a comment on my blog. I don’t get “trolls” very often, and if someone ever does try to be a troll, I just delete their comment. I don’t think your comment was “trollish,” but I think it was misguided in several ways. “BroadBlogs,” you seem to be an intelligent and insightful person. If you are a parent, I’m sure that you are a great parent. If you are not a parent, I know that you would be a loving, caring, nurturing parent. What makes me think that you MIGHT not be a parent is the line in your comment “I hope your daughter doesn’t come to see herself that way.” This, really, comes across as a critique and criticism of my parenting, which, you should just know intrinsically, is NOT done. Not unless a person sees another person abuse or neglect a child, is it ever done. I am pushing 60 years old, pushing it hard, and my daughter is 10. Obviously, my views on women were formed WAY before she was born. The simple fact that she is the only thing I care about in the world, that I believe she causes the sun to rise, has absolutely NOTHING to do with the way I view the women I have been in relationships with. Those viewpoints were formed long before she came along, and in no way affect my treatment of her or my respect and love for her, in the past, present, or future. She will be disrespectful as a teenager; that’s what teens do. We’ll still love each other. From birth, she has been the most loved, nurtured, mentored, and cared-for person on the planet. She has a mom and 2 great dads in her life, aunts that love her, “grandparents” that love her dearly, adult brothers who adore her. Her stepdad loves her as much as if she came out of him, rather than just knowing her and living with her for the last 8+ years. If having an uncaring, mean, or abusive father causes young women to act out and make poor choices, she SHOULD make GREAT choices, much better choices than her parents have made at times. She brings huge smiles to our faces and has huge smiles for us. I’m hoping that she will meet and “light on” a person that is good to her and worth her time, not fall head over heels for someone who lights up the world very brightly, but very briefly, as I’ve run into in my romantic relationships. Anyone, no matter how well raised, can be fooled by someone who is exciting, but not worth their time in the long run. She absolutely will NOT make a bad romantic decision because of a background of not being loved or encouraged in life by her parents, because in fact she is VERY loved and VERY encouraged.
      As to the tone itself, for Christ’s sake, it’s a funny poem, in the same vein as the witty repartee between man and woman that has gone on since Adam and Eve ate the damn apple. Here’s one I read online today: “My wife suggested a book for me to read to enhance our relationship. It’s titled ‘Women Are From Venus and Men Are Wrong.'” That is a clever and silly “poke-in-the-ribs” that a woman would give to a man that she cared about and enjoyed joking with. T-shirts that say “Girls Rule; Boys Drool” are in the same vein. It’s fun and harmless, just like my poem here. If anything else in the poem made one think it was some sort of serious diatribe against women, the line about moving furniture surely would dispel that notion. The last five lines might be taken as being serious, but, there too, they are not to be taken as an actual criticism of woman. Women ARE the eternal mystery to man. They ARE life-giving, both in giving birth and giving their partners “a reason to live.” They are “heart-taking;” they take man’s heart in either a good way or a bad, sometimes one way followed by the other, but they definitely take it.
      And really? The silliest thing you wrote was ” Makes me wonder how having a daughter affects your way of seeing women. Looks like it hasn’t been too beneficial so far.” If, for instance, I had a son who was the kindest, most caring son that a parent could ever ask for, if he were liberal, open-minded, inclusive, and generous, that wouldn’t change my opinion of ADULT men, who range from being great, funny, decent folk, to being total horse’s asses, and every variation in between. Having the funniest, cutest, sweetest daughter in the world has nothing to do with what I think about adult females.
      I greatly respect what you do, “BB,” both with your blog and your teaching, but I think you were dead wrong in your interpretation of this blogpost of mine. Have a nice day.

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