Mind Your Manners

The stunned look on his face at being buried alive was slowly replaced by the realization:  I was killing him, not to keep him quiet, but because he made his new waitress cry.

——————-

(Hopefully this was not an insipid incipit).

Unsurprisingly enough, those 33 words are for the only thing I haven’t been too lazy to “blog” about in the last 4 weeks, that Trifecta Trifextra writing contest thing.  There’s been no inspiration, ambition, or new big thrills whatsoever at this particular “watering hole” lately, unless you count swimming with the kid.  That’s thrilling fun, in its own way (when hanging out with the kid, or having water wash over you when it’s 99 degrees out, lose their thrill, then you can bury me alive), but not real blogworthy.  This isn’t really a “mommy-blog”, after all.

Chuck (Charles Dickens, that is) has nothing to fear from me, as far as opening lines are concerned.

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17 Responses to Mind Your Manners

  1. jannatwrites says:

    That’s a harsh punishment! I guess he won’t do that again, will he? (I’m curious if she relents and frees him and where the story goes from here.)

  2. Lumdog says:

    Someone being buried alive is a real attention grabber. Very few people can tell the tale, so I’m really interested in seeing how this comes out.

  3. Annabelle says:

    Being buried alive is serious stuff, but it’s the bit about making the new waitress cry that really makes this interesting. Well done!

  4. Marie says:

    Yeah. Anybody who makes a waitress cry deserves to… well maybe not be buried alive but something harsh!

  5. This is definitely a dramatic entry to your book. It sounds like we have a Punisher type on the loose. Thanks for linking up with us again this week. We hope to see you back Monday for the new prompt.

  6. Wowza. More please. I want to learn more about that waitress and some very heavy anger issues. 🙂

    LOVE this – and am a new fan and follower.

    Brand new to Trifecta and getting to read some amazing posts. Just posted mine.

    I’ll be back for sure.

    xo

    Christine
    @thatgalkiki

    • I really appreciate all that, Christine. I hope it doesn’t spoil things for you, and in all fairness, there’s nothing in my opening line that says the waitress wasn’t the killer, but it was actually a demented third party who just wants people to be nicer. But anyway, thanks for reading.

  7. Cameron says:

    How very Cornflake Girl. Love it.

    • Thanks for reading and for leading me to Cornflake Girl; had never heard of that. I’m a little “thick” sometimes but I still don’t really understand that song even after reading the explanations of it.

  8. Gregoryno6 says:

    Thinks he’s a man because he made a waitress cry, huh? Let’s see him make a steroid-crazed wrestler cyr! A steroid-crazed wrestler with a shotgun in one hand and a buzzing chainsaw in the other cry! Yeah, I’d like to see that!
    Of course, he wouldn’t exactly be ‘alive’ when you buried him afterwards. More like ‘dismembered and spattered across the walls.’

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