Just to clear up something for anyone who couldn’t, or didn’t want to, open the video in “Yes I do live in a trailer”, my dumb joke is that Meredith Brooks (who is only 3 years younger than me and should definitely stop by, next time she’s in the neighborhood) was wearing some odd-colored green outfit that looked pretty good on her. Every time an attractive woman in tight clothing is within eyeshot and out of earshot at work, I mention to my co-workers (we’ll say she’s wearing a black business suit) “I’ve been thinking of redoing my bedroom floor in black.” I think the thought actually came from an 80s country song called “She can put her shoes under my bed (anytime)”. It’s not a real thrilling song, even if you’re a country music fan, but has a good thought. A friend is complaining about his woman to the singer, and the singer answers:
“But if you want to keep her one thing you better know
Once she gets to walking she won’t have far to go
You know that she can put her shoes under my bed anytime
Anytime that woman’s ready mmm it’ll be okay
She can have the key to my door anytime
And she can move right into my house and stay”
Shoes, green outfit, ladies black business suit, polka-dotted Hutterite farm woman scarf, whatever, there’s room under the bed. Oh, but the opposite of that is the old email forward I received once, that shows a curvy, swimsuit-clad young woman with a caption something like: “Sure, she looks good now, but just remember this: Somebody, somewhere is sick of her shit.”
I was thinking about the first amendment when I was watching that MLK speech video, and of course it brought to mind the question of that wack-job church (mostly one family) from Kansas, who protest at funerals of soldiers. These logic-impaired dipshits say that our soldiers died because the U.S. supports homosexuality. For real. Now, I’m as squeamish as anyone when I hear anything about gayness, and except to joke about it and call my friends “flamers” if we’re in a joking mood, I really don’t want to hear about their funky lifestyles, and don’t see that “Brokeback Mountain” added anything to our culture. But, to say that soldiers’ deaths are the result of that makes about as much sense as saying that the deaths are the result of our support of rap music, or country music, or our support of “American Idol”, or our support of garden vegetables, or our support of hot dogs, or our support of the internet….. But, of course, the courts have decided they can spread their hate. What I don’t get is, why can’t they be allowed to protest, in the same town on the same day as the funeral, hell, maybe even along the funeral motorcade route. But no, FUCK no, they shouldn’t be allowed to spread that evil at the graveyard. The right of the family and friends to have a peaceful ceremony right then, right there, should be protected as their first-amendment right to free assembly. The mourners are not a “public body” or a “government body” which, of course, can and should be sometimes protested against, they are a private group of sad people who have suffered a loss. “No dipshits allowed.”
My horoscope the other day said: “There is a buffer zone around you now, and you are careful to only include those who have proven themselves worthy of getting close to you.” I’m thinking of making a cardboard sign, and standing out on the opposite corner from our one local homeless guy, and only holding up my “YOU’RE WORTHY OF ME” sign when any remotely attractive woman drives by.
I’ve probably “posted” enough for today.
Here’s my honey (the girl in the video, not the guy leaning on the door, thank you very much), with the green outfit, the black, red, and purple dresses that would also look good on my bedroom floor, the hypnotic beat, and the love in the elevator (She was way more famous in the late 90s for her song “Bitch”: “I’m a bitch, I’m a this, I’m a that….”):